Cricket 1890

46 CRICKET: A WEEKLY EECORD OP THE GAME. MAE. 27, 1890. JOHNSON ’S AVERAGE . B y A llison G. O . P a in . Mr. Verdant Green’s score, it will doubtless be remembered, never rose even to a quarter of a “ score.” No more did Johnson’s during his first year in our school eleven— in fact, he played four innings before he had an average at all, and when it did come, it was only a miserable fraction. Once when he made a lucky snick for 3 it warmed up to fths, but three ciphers followed which naturally pulled it down to— well, you can surely work that out for yourselves ! It made no difference whether he went in first or last or fifth wicket down— he was never known to stay in for two minutes. But he was a useful change bowler, swift and straight— the sort o f bowler who would scorn to take a mean advantage of the batsman. He couldn’t always find his way to the wickets, but he frequently managed to catch unwary players a nasty crack just above the top o f their pads, and interfere considerably with their com ­ fort and powers o f locomotion. Often I have heard big bearded men,with consider­ able reputations in their respective clubs, declare that Johnson’s bowling was “ utter piffle,” “ perfectly guileless stuff,” “ play him all-night with a broomstick,” and so on. It is true that these hostile criticisms came, as a rule, from men who had just been bowled out by Johnson, but I was very young at that time and always received the remarks of m y seniors with deferential awe. When the end o f the season came, the Old Boys brought an (incomplete) team, as usual, for the annual “ Past and Present” match. W e “ l oaned” them three masters, not one of whom was in the least likely to hit anything except his own wicket, and also two big fellows out o f the second eleven, besides a couple of visitors who were staying with the Head Master, but still there was a vacancy for one. So the captain in a sndden fit of generosity said “ you shall have Johnson,” and they had him. H e didn’t much like the arrangement because he had been looking forward to the match to “ raise his average,” but the captain consoled him by promising that his rans (if any) should count as if obtained for the school. He even went as far aa to offer Johnson a penny for every run up to 50, and after 50 a penny for the first, twopence for the second and so on. The Present went in first and made a bad start. Johnson bowled the captain out for a “ duck ” and caught the next man off his own ball. After this he didn’t get a wicket, but one of the visitors who was bowling the other end, proved very deadly, and in spite of some atrocious fielding (or mis-fielding) the score only rose to 83. Johnson was put in first and received / first ball. Slight applause at the con­ clusion o f the first over announced that he had completed his longest innings so far that season. The applause was renewed when a single in the slips sent his score up to 4. The captain solemnly produced a fourpenny-piece with a hole in it, and offered it in payment, but Johnson shook his head and said it wouldn’t be lucky to take it. Soon he began to vary his singles with twos and threes, and at length got the captain away to the boundary for 4. He attempted a similar stroke off the next ball, and sent an easy catch to long-on which was declined, much to our astonish­ ment, for we reckoned our long-on a regular Gunn. A few more overs and the bell sounded for luncheon. Johnson’s score by this time was perilously near 50, and only three wickets were down. It was thought by some that after a some­ what lavish lunch with real champagne, Johnson would return to his old form ; but it was not so. He seemed like a giant refreshed, and began to knock the bowl­ ing about in fine style. H e soon found our “ spacious and elegant cricket ground ” (vide prospectus') too cramped and con­ fined for his efforts, and sent one ball through the kitchen-window, and the next into Mrs. Smith’s spare bedroom next door. At 81 he gave what the reporters call a “ possible ” chance at slip— one of those chances that would require a fieldsman with the gift of prophecy and cast-iron fingers. Ten minutes later he completed his century amidst loud applause from everyone, except perhaps the captain, whose 84 had been the best on record up to that date. He gave two very easy chances after that, but neither o f them came to hand, and finally he took out his bat for an innings of 145 out of a total of 253. “ Why on earth did you never do this before ?” asked the captain in deep disgust. It was the first time that the Present had been defeated for years. “ Well, the fact is,” said Johnson, con­ fidentially, “ I ’m as blind as an owl, as you know, and I'm always in a funk with strange bowling, and so I can’t see the ball and I always get out. But to-day I didn’t care about winning, so long as I could make a run or two, and of course I knew your bowling down to the ground. That’s about how it was. What do you owe me ?” “ Taking it as Geometrical Pro­ gression,” said the captain, who was a great mathematical genius, “ I find it comes to about 2‘J figures in pence or 27 figures in pounds. I shan’t be earning anything for three or four years, and when I do, I don’t expect to save more than £100 a year out of m y screw. Still, if you don’t mind waiting till the year 187— and twenty-three noughts— ” “ Suppose,” said Johnson, “ instead of doubling them— penny, twopence, four- pence—we just add one, penny, twopence, threepence, fourpence, what will that come to ?” “ Counting in 4/2 for the first 50, it’s a trifle over £20, and that’s more than you deserve . . . . Look here, you ought I to have been out at 33. I believe Watkins dropped it on purpose, only he w on’t say so. Take 3/9 and say no m ore about it.” “ Eight you are,” said the easy-going, unscientific Johnson. After the prizes had been distributed that evening, the Head Master announced the usual rewards for successful cricketers. Highest individual score, Johnson, 145, “ Not out,” prompted one of the masters who had taken part in the match. “ 145 not out—without a single chance.” (A slight titter at this remarkable adden­ dum). “ Much pleasure in giving you this bat, and hope you may make many hundreds.” Then came a greater surprise. “ Bat for highest average: Johnson, average 13.” “ And seven elevenths,” whispered the prompter. “ And seven elevenths, if you take account of such very vulgar fractions.” “ That can’t be right,” I whispered to the captain, who was sitting next me. “ Your average must be the best.” “ Shut up, you idiot,” said the captain savagely, “ mine's only thirteen and seven tw elfths." “ However,” resumed the Head, ponderously, “ inasmuch as Johnson’s batting during the greater part of the season was not exactly successful— I believe I am correct in saying th a t.he only made five runs in eleven innings ” — (roars o f laughter, in which Johnson joined)— “ and inasmuch ashe has already received one bat, and it is contrary to the rules to play with two bats at on ce”— (renewed laughter)—“ I have decided, in accordance with Johnson’s own wish, to bestow the bat on our gallant captain, who—— ” The remainder of the sentence was lost in a whirlwind of cheers, during which Johnson, you may be sure, was not silent. I don’t think the glorious uncertainty of cricket ever showed itself more gloriously uncertain than in the case of Johnson’s average. Of him, it may be said in the words of a minor poet— “ Like the young man who fell off the top of St. Paul’s, H e has never done anj thing since,” LONDON AND SUBUEBAN ASSOCIATION. A smoking concert, in connection with this Association, was held at A nderton’s H otel, Fleet Street, on the 18th inst. Mr. F. Gale (the Old Buffer) was in the chair. A t the end of a very enjoyable entertainment, the health of the Chairman was proposed by Mr. E . B . "Wells. Mr. Gale, in replying, gave some amusing illustrations of sport in the olden times, and the advantages possessed in the present day, and bore testimony to the excellent effect of the Saturday half-holiday, and the opportunity thereby afforded for sport upon the physical developm ent of “ Young E ngland.” J am es L il l y w h it e ’ s “ Cricketer’s Annual ” for 1890 has just been published. T he Hon. F.dward L yttelton has been appointed Head Master of H aileybury College T h e first weekly summer number of C r ic k e t for this year will appear on April 17. R o g e r I d d iso x , for a long tim e one o f the best all-round Yorkshire cricketers, died at York on the 19th inst. B k o c k w e ll , the young Surrey professional, took nine wickets of > ighteen of Arab C.C., for the E clectic, at Kimberley, on Feb. 15. M r. A l b e r t G. D a y , of Dewsbury, the well-known Yorkshire amateur, was married on Tuesday, at St. M ary’s Church, Harrogate, to Miss Gertrude Sutcliffe of that town, NEXT ISSUE, APRIL 17.